Presenting the draft red herring prospectus for the initial public offer of Indian Political League Ltd (IPLL), to raise Rs(271x25) crore through a 100% reverse book building process. Your proposed company will be engaged in the business of investing in the honourable members of Parliament (MPs) of India for aggregating them towards the formation/destruction of Central governments of India.
Your Company has identified an opportunity looking at the current market situation where the national parties have lost the influence or significance to garner enough votes or hold allies together. Also, India’s first family’s influence on Indian politics is close to an end, with Junior having shown his empty hand time and again. Your Company has observed that in the current market, the “Maya” of smaller parties is far more than that of larger ones. These factors present the need for a listed company that would trade in MPs, and let the people of this country benefit from the surpluses generated in this trade.
The business model of Your Company would be to buy out MPs soon after elections and enter into a legal contract for their assured support towards the cause of Your Company for the term of their election. After aggregating various MPs, we would be able to sell/pledge the whole for more than the sum of the parts. The perfect market scenario that Your Company would create would help MPs find their true worth (which as per various analyst views is much lower than their current valuations). Your Company will also float a private equity fund that would invest in electoral contestants prior to elections, thereby locking in their potential support, if elected, at attractive valuations. Before any vote on key issues Your Company would invite public voting by SMS, and if the revenue generated from e-polling is more than that offered by any other party, the MPs (henceforth mentioned as “the Assets of Your Company”) would vote accordingly. Your SMS would have a weightage proportionate to your shareholding where as a non-shareholder would get only one vote.
Corporate and Social Responsibility: The business model of Your Company is to empower the shareholders to have a share of the wealth being generated by the elected representatives of our country. Moreover, Your Company would lead to a more stable government, as Assets of Your Company would vote in a predictable way, based on the contracts entered into by Your Company. Your Company would close negotiations/trades one week before any key vote in Parliament, thereby reducing uncertainty about the future of the government and thereby reducing volatility in the money markets and the stock markets. The payments for purchase of assets would be made after TDS (tax deducted at source). The boost to the exchequer of our country is needless to be mentioned (take that, PC!)
Why should you invest? This is your chance to get a share in the financial potential of your elected representatives. Moreover you can invest through online demat sites; unlike elections, where you have to queue up in the sun and end up getting no fiduciary benefits, except for the occasional pouch of country liquor or country-made weapons. The stock of Your Company would have a negative beta (moving contrary to the rest of the stock market), as any volatility at the Centre would boost the market value of Your Company, while the rest of the stock market would fall — the perfect hedge.
Your Company has filed a patent to avoid other listed companies coming into this business. We are also proposing legal action against a few of the large(st) existing listed companies that are currently indulging in this business, without having “horse trading” mentioned as one of their primary activities in their memorandum of articles.
Offer open till democracy lasts!
Gautam Gaur, an alumnus of IIM Ahmedabad, works for a financial services firm in Mumbai. Comment at firstname.lastname@example.org