How to flourish in an age of tech

In the last couple of years, a conversation that is gaining prominence is around the lens of flourishing. This focuses on how we can build a life where we feel socially connected, are able to build a good life for ourselves, enjoy purpose, enjoy our work and have meaning that allows us to feel centred. A component which is key to this conversation is how do we allow ourselves to flourish when it comes to technology, social media and digital spaces? This has led to the term “digital flourishing”. Given that clients in therapy consistently talk about how they spend long durations of time either online, feel overstimulated and wired due to their screen exposure or experience unpleasant feelings due to social comparison, a look at our lives through the lens of digital flourishing is important.

What’s crucial is to become aware of how technology and online spaces are allowing us to stay connected, be productive and at the same time take care of our mental and physical health. Digital wellness or flourishing in essence involves a lens of mindfulness in terms of how we interact with technology and how it impacts our overall well-being. There is no running away from technology or devices. It’s crucial for each one of us to define for ourselves what it would mean to flourish in a digital age. Sophie H. Janicke, assistant professor at the School of Communication at Chapman University, California, in a 2021 study, she defines digital flourishing as “the positive perceptions of an individual’s experiences and behaviours in digital communication”. 

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Digital flourishing is linked to how technology allows us to build a bridge for connection, community and at times solidarity as we struggle and deal with difficult situations. Second, digital spaces can become platforms for us to express, participate, feel seen and at the same time discover ourselves through others’ shared narratives. Third, as a therapist, I find it fascinating to observe how people find hope and optimism in using technology and digital spaces. In a tech-enabled world, if we can learn how to monitor our sleep, physical health, exercise, and health in an intentional but non-hypervigilant manner, tech-based communication can become a huge asset, adding to our sense of well-being and vitality. At the same time, many of us feel consumed by technology, experiencing a feeling of being “tired and wired”. As a therapist, I feel flourishing in a digital age is about managing the component of self-regulation and control. A good lens is to examine how we can regain autonomy and learn to not give in to the itch of technology or devices. This can be a first step which can go a long way in learning to become more intentional in our use of technology. Every time you are using technology or your device to distract yourself from a key assignment or feel the itch to reach out for the phone when in the company of friends or family, choose to manage the itch, rather than give in to it. We owe it to ourselves and those we love—an attentive presence and conversations which don’t come with digital interference.

I often remind clients to become aware of what scrolling mindlessly or even for few minutes does to your body. Very often clients report how they feel anxious, unsettled or are impacted by a feeling of “not being good enough” or that life has not been fair to them. If the clients are already in a low mood or anxious, it pushes them down the rabbit hole of doom and gloom and despair and leaves them agitated, sometimes with a feeling of bitterness. Choosing to step away and engage in self-soothing behaviours that centre us and allow our body to feel regulated again is key part of digital flourishing in my understanding.

I recognise that navigating the landscape of technology and virtual spaces is a tricky one, so our lens of digital flourishing and mindfulness must be an ongoing one. So, being our own ally is crucial as we take small, incremental steps towards digital flourishing.

Sonali Gupta is a Mumbai-based clinical psychologist. She is the author of the book Anxiety: Overcome It And Live Without Fear and has a YouTube channel, Mental Health with Sonali. 

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