Puppy blues are real: Why bringing home a new dog can feel overwhelming

I went through it myself when Musafir, my Golden Retriever, arrived. Friends congratulated me, family swooned, and strangers cooed over him in the street. Inside, I was tired and secretly wondering if I had made a mistake. Musafir had already been put up for adoption once, and while I do not know the whole story, I suspect his previous parent felt the same. Puppy blues are not about a lack of love. They happen when reality does not match expectation.

The challenges are varied. Sleepless nights come first. Puppies wake often, cry when alone, and need toilet breaks at odd hours. The lack of rest magnifies every problem. Then comes the loss of freedom. Puppy parents find they cannot run errands or even shower without worrying what chaos will unfold. Destructive chewing and nipping feel like toddler tantrums, only with sharper teeth. Toilet training accidents add to the frustration. And then there is guilt. Many wonder why they are not happier.

Another difficulty, often overlooked, is the inability to understand what the puppy wants. Is that whining hunger, boredom, or a sign of illness? Are you feeding the right food in the right amounts? Is the puppy unwell or simply tired? Should you start training now or wait? The uncertainty is draining.

Practical solutions make the difference. For sleep problems, a routine and a crate are helpful, and sharing night duty helps spread the load. Freedom returns gradually when you plan your day. Use safe enrichment toys to keep your puppy occupied. Puppy-proofing your home helps, and redirecting your puppy calmly to chew toys teaches better habits. Toilet training succeeds with consistency, timing and praise.

For the uncertainty about needs, guidance is key. Stick to a balanced, veterinary-recommended diet rather than experimenting with random foods. Regular health checks in the first year give you confidence that your puppy is thriving. Learn to recognise early warning signs such as vomiting, diarrhoea or lethargy, and do not hesitate to call your vet if in doubt.

With training, start simple and positive. Most importantly, remember that it is normal not to have all the answers. Asking for help from trainers or vets is not a weakness.

Puppy blues are one of the main reasons for abandonment. Many pups end up in shelters because their families feel overwhelmed. Speaking openly about puppy blues can save many dogs and prevent families from giving up. This is also why puppies should never be bought impulsively. Children may beg, but they are not the ones handling sleepless nights, toilet training or health scares.

Breed and home mismatches make the struggle harder. High-energy working breeds in small flats or dogs needing constant attention in busy homes lead to frustration on both sides. Choosing a breed or individual dog that suits your lifestyle is as important as deciding to get one in the first place.

The good news is that, as with children, the storm does pass. Puppies grow, routines form, and confusion eases. I still remember the relief of Musafir’s first full night of sleep and the pride when he came back to me in the park when called. Now he is the calm presence at my side, and it is hard to believe I once wondered if I could cope. Parenting, whether of a child or pup, is messy, tiring, and uncertain. If you are going through the puppy blues, know this: you aren’t failing, you’re adjusting. You’ll come through it stronger.

Nameeta Nadkarni is a veterinary soft tissue surgeon and pet blogger from Mumbai.