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Business News/ Opinion / Columns/  Relieve the unfair burden of staying single in India Inc
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Relieve the unfair burden of staying single in India Inc

The concept of ‘me time’ and its importance may be poorly appreciated and seen as a reward for the married lot in a workplace, but for the unmarried, it can be looked upon as an excuse

(FILES) Given a complex matrix of prejudices that society is taking too long to get past and discard, labelling comes fast and quick for the single lot, and they usually have to tip-toe around gender-based social norms. (Photo by NICOLAS ASFOURI / AFP) (AFP)Premium
(FILES) Given a complex matrix of prejudices that society is taking too long to get past and discard, labelling comes fast and quick for the single lot, and they usually have to tip-toe around gender-based social norms. (Photo by NICOLAS ASFOURI / AFP) (AFP)

Corporate India, by and large, has a rigid hierarchy in place where the decisions of a single working woman are often questioned more than those of her counterparts who are male and married, female and married, and also male and unmarried. These questions may range from her reluctance to work longer hours or log in during the weekend, or even her need to leave office early on occasion. Her leadership and multi-tasking abilities are often questioned disproportionately not just by a male-dominated corporate structure, but also by her closest aides in office.

“There have been many days when my life’s choices were questioned. The probe included why I am not married to what are my future plans. When the team has to stretch, those with children leave early because they are considered to have more responsibilities than some of us who are single," said a senior HR executive at a major retail company in India.

Such probes do not come only from men in office, but also from women. The retail chain HR executive recounted that during the covid pandemic, the married lot in her firm were allowed far more flexibility when it came to working hours than those like her. “I was asked many times if I could fill in for them since I did not have much responsibility. What if I wanted to take some time off and read a book? That I am responsible towards myself and hence need some time off could never trump the time consumed by rearing a family," she said.

The concept of ‘me time’ and its importance may be poorly appreciated and seen as a reward for the married lot in a workplace, but for the unmarried, it can be looked upon as an excuse.

An article in The Washington Post, titled ‘These single women say they face a workplace penalty, too’, details studies done to see how marital status can impact workplace biases. One research study examined the career trajectory of two groups of MBA graduates from the same business school programme. “Again, single women with noted analytical skills were the most penalized in terms of advancement into leadership positions," reports the article.

“I was told that I need to hone my leadership and multi-tasking qualities, and, unlike the other women in my team, I have not experienced raising a family and straddling many roles. Hence, I was unprepared," said another senior executive working in one of the country’s largest business houses. She is in her forties and single.

There was no attempt to even find out whether she had other familial responsibilities, according to the executive, not that it was a necessary criterion to head a team. Ironically, the small but growing subset of women in the Indian workforce who are single tend to get judged by both male and female colleagues at work.

A young financial analyst in her early thirties said she was struck by how colleagues who returned from their maternity leaves were treated. Most women in office engulfed the new mother in their fold. Those getting married too were given a wide berth because they were said or thought to be going through adjustments in their new home, but no space was created for women not thought to need such accommodation. “I am made to feel that I have not taken a different route, but rather missed out on important and necessary milestones which act like rites of passage to work my way up the corporate ladder," said the financial analyst.

While men who have not opted for married life face their own set of challenges, the ‘boys’ clubs’ that hold sway in many corporate settings tend to take care of their own, with after- office-hours bonding common among colleagues. “We do not even have that option. The moral yardsticks are laid out thick and close for us," said the HR executive in the retail sector cited earlier. She lives in Mumbai, but has to be extremely cautious when it comes to office gatherings. She takes her drinks slow, doesn’t dance a lot on the floor, even when the music is great, and has a select group of people with whom she steps out for an occasional smoke.

Given a complex matrix of prejudices that society is taking too long to get past and discard, labelling comes fast and quick for the single lot, and they usually have to tip-toe around gender-based social norms. Single working women also find they must fend for the privacy of their lives very carefully, because being spotted with someone over a casual coffee can turn into water- cooler gossip very fast.

Single working women represent a growing force in urban work spaces that is not as vastly documented as, say, young mothers or married women who are often forced to opt out of India Inc. Not being married does not mean that the struggle for promotions and stress of juggling home and office responsibilities is any less. These and other work challenges are just as real and tough as for any woman. Yet, they find their time taken for granted and actions under a scanner too frequently. The workplace needs to a part of her life where only her work counts. Without any penalties to be paid for personal life choices.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Devina Sengupta
Devina tracks and writes on workplaces, human resources and education for Mint. She also occaisionally writes an opinion column. She hosts a podcast on interesting HR trends in corporate India called The Working Life.
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Published: 02 Mar 2023, 11:13 PM IST
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