Opinion | Your body is most spectacular instrument you own, don’t belittle it

Two months ago, in the middle of the lockdown, I was lamenting about my “covid-kilos” and new-found flab to my bestie, when I suddenly noticed my daughter in the room.

My friend and I missed our exercise routines, and were not proud of cooking what was easy (and yummy)! We were laughing, crying, cracking mean jokes about our flab and tighter clothes.

We commiserated about the acute fatigue of household-chores without once connecting the dots, that our excess calorie consumption was probably a way to deal with anxiety. After all, food was the only stressbuster accessible, when building gates were locked from the inside!

Thankfully, the vibration of my own words stopped me in my tracks, when I saw my child silently absorbing them. Did I wish to set her up for a similar self-talk in the future? Absolutely not.

The lockdown had been excruciating emotionally and physically for all of us, including children. Regular avenues to release stress such as playing together, get-togethers, and travel seemed a distant reality not just during the lockdown, but even a year later. Unlocking did not ease the anxiety which hung all around us, like a dense cloud.

And yet, my brain wired to see the world through a negative lens, didn’t applaud my body for ensuring:

- my family’s well-being and remaining fit myself

- meeting work deadlines satisfactorily

- completing household chores done by two or more support staff during normal times

- and finding the time to update my skills, taking advantage of the fabulous online learning opportunities.

I recalled the words of thought leader and best-selling author Taryn Brumfitt,“in these uncertain times, we needed to lower the bar and make our homes judgement-free zones where we could practice self-love, self-care and embracing our bodies.”

This was nothing but mind control that has been outlined in the Holy Bhagavad Gita, thousands of years ago. The 5th Shloka in Chapter 6 clearly explains how the mind can be our friend if we conquer it, and if we don’t it will be our greatest enemy.

Taming the Shrew, our Monkey Mind

My friend and I made a pact. We decided to tame our minds out of the negative chatter and engage in self -care.

If we couldn’t stop judging ourselves at a time as demanding as this, what message were we giving to the little ones who looked up to us?

This responsibility helped me change the narrative, immediately. Not only did I stop judging myself, I shared my thoughts with my immediate circle, who wondered if I was faking it.

It's true, it isn't easy to sound positive, when everyone around is negative. Our mammal brains were tempted to run where the rest of the herd ran.

I took simple steps to clean up my social media accounts: I unfollowed, or refused to share self-deprecatory jokes and memes I earlier thought I enjoyed. I blocked negative people, who refused to stop whining and followed those who fought their demons and inspired others.

Identifying what gave me joy also set me free. For e.g. I loved watching movies with my family during dinner. This meant relaxing the “mindfulness rules” that were not-negotiable during normal times.

I also pushed myself out of my comfort zone and became super regular in my yoga practice, including challenging asanas and kriyas which had always paid off in the past. Yoga was a great reminder that strength and flexibility mattered more than weight. And contentment controlled appetite like nothing else.

Powerful rituals to the rescue

I conned my family into meditating everyday with me, when they seemed amiable (mostly after being bribed with cakes).

At the end of each day, we followed an easy ritual I’d learnt during a journaling workshop wherein each of us would recount three good things, three bad things and three things that we were grateful for.

This gave us a deep awareness of how the same experiences were being interpreted by different members in the same house.

It helped to bring us to the present moment. Even the youngest member of the family was grateful for just “being well.”

Slowly but surely, a shift took place. Wellness became an entity far more powerful than extraneous things such as calories or size.

Thereby and to make this intentionally poetic: the sky seemed brighter for each one of us, a shared view of the stars made the darkness fade into the background.

Those around me began asking how I could remain happy during a time like this, and wanted to know what I was doing right.

And that’s how, the debilitating lockdown turned into a deep experience of mindfulness and joy. Of being grateful for this life, and everything our body can do for us.

More importantly, changing the way we spoke about our bodies at home, opened up the space for far more extraordinary conversations laced in deep, calming exhalations. And this is a change, I would hold on to for rest of my post lockdown life.

(Suman Chhabria Addepalli is a yoga and mindfulness coach, published author, and director at ed-tech startup GlobalGyan. The views expressed in the article are her own and do not reflect Mint's.)